The Epic

2009-07-18T18:05:00.000-07:00

The moon, somewheres in Nebraska.

At a gas station, somewheres in Nebraska.

The sunrise, same place.

Wyoming.

Again.

Again. We stopped and ate lunch here.
A windmill farm, somewhere out west. . .don't remember the state.

Our camping spot, just outside Salt Lake City.
We went to Idaho.

And then to Oregon.Oregon is a big place.

We conquered that tree in a random tree farm in Oregon.

The Columbia river, just outside The Dalles.

We stopped to throw big rocks in the river.

. . .and took pictures of flowers.

Our epicosity cannot be contained.

Obviously.
The sand was shiny.

We like fire.

Ian got buried. . .and stickmannified.
Somehow, TEAM EPIC got inscribed in the sand. . .
This cliff and dunes formation occupied us for several hours.
One Highway 101 going north along the coast.

2009-07-17T14:32:00.000-07:00

We rendezvoused with Adam and hiked Mt. Si in Washington.
There was a big rock. Carl climbed it.
On the way out of Washington, we encountered a herd of large metal horses. Odd.
We were willing to lay down everything, even our lives. . .

Funny story. Ask sometime.
Glacier National Park is a pretty place. So is Lake McDonald in said park.
We still like fire. . .
And food.
It's even prettier in the morning.
It's the clearest lake I've ever seen. You can see the rocks on the bottom through probably 10 feet of water.
We hiked to a lookout close to the top of Mt. Brown
It was cold.
We also drove up Going to the Sun Road, which took us to the Continental Divide in Glacier. It was amazing.

Shadows are pretty cool.
So are the Badlands.
Pano!

We were sad.

Thus concludes the last post on this blog (I think). I'm done.

Happy Guys

2009-07-08T18:46:00.000-07:00

A few teary-eyed gentlemen

2009-07-02T23:05:00.000-07:00

A few end of the trip statistics

2009-07-01T16:20:00.000-07:00

Miles traveled: 4800*
Longest time period without a shower: 71 hours
Number of Pictures taken: 2723
Gigabytes of pictures: 6.24
Highest hours-of-movies-watched to hours-slept ratio (for one day): 18:1*
Number of chick-flicks watched: 1
Number of tears shed whilst watching said chick-flick: 2.6
Number of Beards grown: 0.2
Money spent on trip: none o' yo' biz
Call your mom hours: 1
Call your Dad hours: 1
Call your girl hours: 1
Number of deaths: 0.3
Number of hamburgers eaten: 35
Number of hot dogs eaten: 36+
Number of Taco Bell stops: 2 Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Vertical feet climbed: 8294+
Number of cartwheels/flips/ninja rolls: incalculable*
Number of mosquitos killed: 846*
Number of welcome signs climbed: 2
Number of welcome signs posed with: 8
Number of U-turns: 3*
Number of illegal activities: none o' yo' biz. But more than one.
Most frequently played CD's: "Let It Snow, Baby, Let It Reindeer" & "Take Everything"
Most Quoted TV show: The Office
Number of theme songs: 5
Names of aforementioned theme songs:
1. The Office Theme Song
2. He's a Pirate (rock mix)
3. Mortal Kombat Theme Song
4. Pressing On
5. Sleigh Ride
Beverage consumed the most: Water (with Mountain Dew being a close second)
Time zones occupied: 3

*approximate

It's over!

2009-06-29T13:33:00.000-07:00

2009-06-28T15:39:00.000-07:00

Day 9: Hearts grow heavy, and eyes moist as this EPIC adventure on which Team EPIC has embarked grows to a close.

After a light breakfast of Honey & Nut Sweetened Whole Grain Oat Cereal topped with Land o' Lakes 1% Low Fat Milk (don't think they're being healthy. . .they still eat gratuitous amounts of mayonnaise on their sandwiches), Team EPIC set out for a quick excursion into the dry, dusty, hostile Badlands. The excursion was, of course, EPIC. Miraculously, the only injuries sustained were a slightly twisted ankle and a few scraped hands. After their quick excursion, Team EPIC set out on their long homeward journey (hence the moist eyes) In the first hour of their trip, Team EPIC belted out hymns at the top of their lungs until they had exhausted their repertoire of hymns and worship songs. Since then, things have been rather boring, with the back seat-dwelling members watching movies, and the front seat members talking.

Team Member E: "This job is so important I'm going to run to go do it!"

Team EPIC is so EPIC even their shadows are EPIC.

More pictures to come.

Questions are now answered!

2009-06-28T15:20:00.001-07:00

If you, at some point, asked a question via a comment on one of the blog posts, they have now been answered!

2009-06-27T11:37:00.001-07:00

More pictures:

2009-06-27T09:44:00.001-07:00

The sunrise over Lake McDonald (Glacier National Park)

Various views from the hike up Mt. Brown (also Glacier National Park)

2009-06-27T09:40:00.000-07:00

Day 7 (6.27.209): An inside informer has made it known that Team EPIC is now in Glacier National Park. They apparently climbed the Mt. Brown trail, making for a 10.6 mile round trip with a vertical gain of 4300 feet. Weather was nice at the bottom, even a little bit warm as the hike was a stiff one, but at the top, the chilling wind cut to the bone and froze digits. It was miserable for a little bit. The trail did not terminate at the peak of Mt. Brown, only at an overlook. However, Team Members A & D, the most adventuresome/exuberant members of the group, attempted to make the final climb. Fighting through snow on near-vertical slopes, they made it to within a few hundered feet of the peak. This (a.k.a. vertical cliff), however, proved too much of a match even for these exuberant adventurers, and all members made the return trip, averaging approx. 3.415 mph. It was a bit hard on the knees. Safely back at the truck, the team made the scenic trip to the Continental divide along Going To The Sun road, providing them with quite possibly the most beautiful scenery of the entire trip. Supper was hamburgers and hot dogs roasted over a fire by Lake McDonald.

The team is now near Helena, MT, and is on their way to the Badlands in South Dakota.

Side note: the random, seemingly unrelated pictures of metal horses were taken at a monument of sorts in eastern Washington.

*UPDATE* During the writing of this post, the interwebz connection was lost, and was just now recovered. Team EPIC now resides in eastern Montana.

*

Answers!

2009-06-27T07:40:00.000-07:00

2009-06-25T16:00:00.000-07:00

The view that Team EPIC experienced after dominating Mt. Si in Washington.

2009-06-25T14:09:00.000-07:00

Photo credits go to Auxiliary Team Member F and Team Member B.

GET ALL YOUR EPIC MERCHANDISE TODAY!

2009-06-24T23:06:00.000-07:00

Team Epic's Online Store is now open and ready for business! There you can purchase Epic t-shirts, mugs, hats, and more! Check it out today at www.cafepress.com/TheEpic.

2009-06-24T22:38:00.000-07:00

Team EPIC has finally been spotted again! According to the Team, they went to an epicore sand dune yesterday, and frolicked on it for almost two hours. Apparently they did some pretty amazing scrambling up and down sheer rock faces and stomach-turning somersaults down the gnarly sand dunes. Following that, the Team scooted up to Seattle and camped just north of that mysterious city. After a refreshing night spent in the trailer, the TEAM plus the auxilary member Adam Nisbett, hiked up a crazy high mountain in the middle of nowhere. The hike lasted around four hours and resulted in severely sore legs. Team EPIC and Adam went their separate ways - the TEAM to Spokane, WA; and Adam to be Sleepless in Seattle. The TEAM is now residing in a campground in Plummer, Idaho; and plan to traverse the highway to Glacier National Park on the morrow.

2009-06-24T21:03:00.000-07:00

More to come.

Some quotes from the past few days. . .

2009-06-24T14:30:00.000-07:00

"I can't really tell you what my burping status is right now."

"I'm not really man enough."

"Girls? I like girls."

"Can you work a miracle without slapping me? Nope. *Ka-bang!*"

"I wish history never happened"

"Let's get back to swearing."

"Dog tails aren't hexagonal."

"I loooooove civil disobedience!"

"Blood alone moves the wheels of history!"

"Man, it reeks!"

"That's not water Ian!"

"Beer me a Taco Bell"

"You're being racist towards witches!"

"Man, what is wrong with me?"

2009-06-23T10:34:00.000-07:00

The neighbors' camper

Joel

Carl

The Sea Gypsy

Self-explanatory

2009-06-23T09:59:00.001-07:00

WE ARE WARRIORS!!

2009-06-23T09:44:00.000-07:00

Team Epic has been very busy the last 24 hours! Since yesterday, they left the hotel, went and picked up team member B from his sales calls and headed to a park for lunch. At the park, they engaged two middle aged men in a vicious game of volleyball and were, unfortunately, destroyed. However, Team EPIC bounced back to two more victories. Pictures will follow. After the park, the TEAM headed to the beach! Arriving around 8:00, they quickly set up camp and rode to the beach on their bicycles and took some epic pictures and had a nice ride along the beach. Pictures are to come.

2009-06-22T10:01:00.000-07:00

After a comfy night of sleep, Team EPIC went into the lobby and devoured the remains of the continental breakfast. Unfortunately, there were not any donuts left for them. Poppyseed bread and apple juice were the preferred food/beverage. As of right now, Team EPIC is reclining in their hotel room listening to epic music by John Philip Sousa and preparing for a exploring excursion all around Portland. Their plan is to leave Portland around 4:30 or 5:00 and head to the beach to set up camp for the night.

2009-06-21T23:32:00.001-07:00

At exactly 8:59:30 PM, team Epic rolled into the Walmart parking lot, precisely 30 seconds early. Over an approximately 36 hour trip, this comes out to a .0231% error in planning the timeline of the trip. Not shabby. With the goal of their trip accomplished, the team now seeks a hotel near Portland in which to spend the night.

2009-06-21T16:26:00.000-07:00

Team EPIC is now 165 miles from Portland. Evening plans include stopping in The Dalles, OR for supper with a friend of some of the members', James Frey. The lone noteworthy occurrence since last post was stopping and visiting a large tree farm. After climbing up a dead tree, team member E volunteered to fall on a sharp, broken stump to give the team a good story. Fortunately, he was dissuaded.

No conclusion was reached concerning the previous discussion topic, and the team has now moved on to the topic of profanity.

Oregon!

2009-06-21T15:12:00.000-07:00

Team EPIC has had a relatively uneventful day on the road. Starting the morning at 5:00 AM near Salt Lake City, UT, with sunrise pictures and freezing (most of the way) to death, they have crossed through Idaho and are now approximately 200 miles from Portland. Taking a break from multimedia, their time is now occupied with discussing deep moral issues. The current moral issue pertains to the following situations:

A killer (not a Christian) is getting ready to kill your friend (a Christian in one situation, not a Christian in the other), and you have the power to kill the killer, thus preventing him from killing your friend. Is it morally (Scripturally, that is) justifiable to kill the killer?

Team EPIC has not come to a conclusion, and probably won't.

Upcoming discussion includes foul language, speeding, tattoos/piercings, alcohol/smoking, and whether or not to use life support in certain situations.

Father's Day!

2009-06-21T08:14:00.000-07:00

It has come to the attention of Team EPIC that today is Father's Day. The Team has stated their regret that they cannot be home with their Fathers right now, but they would like to wish each of their Fathers a HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

2009-06-20T20:08:00.001-07:00

News flash!

Team EPIC has decided to locate in a campground near the Great Salt Lake for the night, and is currently cooking meat for tacos. Two half starving mongerels steal about their campsite hoping for a tasty tidbit or two. However, Team EPIC is refusing to give them anything. A night bicycle ride around their campground might be in order after their evening meal.

2009-06-20T18:40:00.001-07:00

At precisely 7:40 PM MST, Team EPIC was spotted pulling into Willow Creek Campground to spend the night. Despite the heavy rainfall, they are determined not to pay for a hotel. There is discussion going on at this moment as to whether or not they should put up a tent or try to sleep in the trailer.
Right behind their lovely campground is a bay from the Great Salt Lake. Should be enjoyable.

A few pictures from today:

2009-06-20T14:53:00.000-07:00

It was an early morning. That's all.

2009-06-20T07:26:00.000-07:00

2009-06-20T07:04:00.000-07:00

Time: 8:04 AM. Team Epic has just crossed into Mountain Standard Time. Although still in Nebraska, the TEAM can begin to sense the mountains approaching.
Instead of flat, boring country, the EPIC now gets to behold rolling, grassy hills in western NE. Pictures to come.

P.S. Certain members of the TEAM have still not sleeped a wink. In an exclusive interview with TEAM EPIC, certain members were quoted as saying "You can sleelp wheen your' deead"

Breakfast!

2009-06-20T05:01:00.000-07:00

The time is 7:31 AM, and Team Epic has been spotted vacating the premises of a Nebraskan rest area. Certain members of the Team have not slept a wink all night. Watching movies is becoming difficult due to prolonged blinks. However, as previously stated, certain members have not slept a wink. Perhaps the repeating of certain statements is due to the not sleeping of a wink. Harvest Peach seems to be the preferred flavor of yogurt today. More to come.

P.S. The small crisis previously underway has been resolved with no serious long-term consequences.

The Few, the Proud, the Epic.

2009-06-19T21:51:00.000-07:00

Team Epic is on the road! The Team is an elite force who's one and only mission is to embrace the daunting responsibility of saving the earth from a super cyber-intelligence. They will not stop, they will not rest, they will not eat, drink, or stop watching movies until they have achieved their goal and fulfilled their destiny! For this mission, they will be trucking almost non-stop to McMinnville, OR, near Portland to deliver storage units critical to the survival of all mankind. From there, they perform a super secret, undercover mission involving fluid transportation devices. Then they make a high speed escape from Ninjas sent to assasinate them. Stay tuned for more updates as the mission progresses.

Random Mission Quotes:

"I feel the need to brush my teeth."

"Everybody remain calm. We only have a small crisis underway."

"The intelligence of an average human comes from powerful bacteria drowned in a sea of communicating gravel."